So…  You do the church thing,  right? 

I did not know until tonight that there was a such thing as ‘the church thing.’  Yet here I was sitting face to face with a man who thought he’d advance in favor with me,  with a line like that.  

Before we dig into the ridiculousness of this statement lets applauded the gentleman for being bold in his want for me.  I say that as I sarcastically side eye the men in my life who like the softer,  3 year,  she’s married before you have the nerve to step up –  approach.  

This man started with the usual –  you so fynezz…  Followed up by the stalkish yet popular –  I’ve been watching you for a while..  He even ventured into the –  you could be a plus size model,  you are so beautiful  zone before sneaking in..  The church thing.  The ONLY thing that got a response. 

I invited him to attend service. 

You think I didn’t.

You think he doesn’t know that he is welcome at the Potters House of Ft.  Worth?! 

Yes.  He.  Does.  And that church is not a ‘thing.’ 

Let me give you a brief synopsis as to why.  I’m sitting in Club Dreamz in North Dallas.  Have you heard of it..  No? 

Good for you. 

This is the same club that I stood in 9 years ago when I first moved to Dallas. 

Dress (shirt),  high heels,  smokey eyed and fully sober on the stage at Club Dreamz where I had positioned myself to see what all was happening around me. I disguised it as dancing.  

It’s a trick I still use today.  Blend in.  Look natural.  They won’t know you don’t belong here. Don’t let them see you sweat. 

And,  boy was I sweating!  

Low key scared of the butch girl who wasn’t happy that I swatted her hand bc she couldn’t touch me.  Low key terrified of the possibility of being jumped by the group of girls eyeing me cause the men in their section  keep watching me.  Anxiously waiting for the back door that my boyfriend went through to open and he returned to get me from this..  This unfamiliar..  This unsafe.. This waiting,  till his drug transaction was complete. 

There is really no strong transition to telling you that I have lived through plenty scenes that you thought were created for a good read.  Back when Black Excellence was  a fantasy and God was just some figure in the sky that thankfully protected me.  

Sober…  Ignorant…  Me.. 

It is not through the book smart learning of God that has created a change in me but..  A relationship has proven Him to be as touchable as you and me.  

Bullets have passed through me.  Wounds have instantly healed.  Harm has unimaginably missed me.  

Jesus Christ is available and his miracles happen consistently.  

And here I stand at the beginning of the end of my previous life.  

9 years later. 

Swing dancing at club Dreamz! 

And being confident of this very thing..

That church is certainly NOT a ‘thing.’

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